Living a fast-paced life can distract you very quickly from living your life deliberately. At a certain point, you’ll lose track of your life and get stuck in habits which can be pretty frustrating. Nowadays a ton of self-help books tell you how to change your mindset almost overnight. The truth is that you can’t: Change needs a lot of time, willpower and endurance. Therefore, a clear structure can be a solid base for making sustainable changes in your mindset.
Ein Beitrag von Gastautor Stephan Wüest
Especially in the beginning, such a journey is not easy but once you start realizing/feeling the changes you will be grateful for having started it.
In fact, the concept to change your mindset is very simple and it contains only three components:
- Idea
- Plan
- Action
Idea
It’s time to get a pen and a piece of paper to create two lists. The first list defines interests, activities or personal growth goals that you want to accomplish. The second one contains habits that you want to leave behind. Therefore, you have to – without lying to yourself – ask yourself what you love and what makes you happy and think about what you don’t love or what doesn’t make you happy. You’re doing this for yourself so by using the word “I” you refer to yourself as a person and not to just anyone – I think, I decide and I do.
Here’s an example of such a list:
- I want to be a person who writes blog articles about interior architecture and photography (because I’m passionate about interior architecture and photography and I like writing).
- I want to be a person who listens attentively to other people (because it can be interesting and so opens up my horizons).
- … to be continued
You need to be aware of the characteristics or habits that you want to leave behind. Therefore, list two can help:
- Currently, I’m a person who lays on the couch when coming home from university to then scroll through social media for two hours (which makes me feel as if I didn’t accomplish anything that day and leaves me frustrated).
- Currently, I’m a person who interrupts conversational partners too quickly (because I want to add something and this characteristic makes me feel disrespectful towards the conversational partner because they couldn’t finish what they wanted to say to me).
- … to be continued
The goal of these two lists is to reflect and visualize what you want to deal with. This way it’s easier to focus towards the new qualities and away from the old ones.
Plan
A connection between the new and old qualities shows you why changing towards the aspired state of mind is more attractive than remaining in the current state of mind (which doesn’t fulfill you…).
You probably guessed it – It’s time to write another list:
- I want to be a person who writes blog articles about interior architecture and photography (because I’m passionate about interior architecture and photography and I like writing). To become such a person, I’m not a person who comes home from university to lay on the couch and mindlessly scroll through social media content (which makes me feel as if I didn’t accomplish anything that day and leaves me frustrated).
- I want to be a person who listens attentively to other people (because it can be interesting and so opens up my horizons). To become such a person, I’m not a person who interrupts conversational partners too quickly (because I want to add something and this characteristic makes me feel disrespectful towards the conversational partner because they couldn’t end what they wanted to say to me).
- …to be continued
Action
“Why change something when it’s already working?” – The human being is lazy. A lot of people accept negative mindsets or that other people control their life rather than taking responsibility on their own. In the end, every life on this planet has an expiration date, so while you’re healthy you better make use of the time that is being handed to you. Taking responsibility for yourself and what’s very important: Starting this journey out of your heart and doing it for yourself – will guide you on your journey. Sometimes you might not exactly know if you’re doing it a 100% for yourself or for someone else and you also can’t avoid friction or breaks but you will definitely not have to bend or hide yourself. Once you see your life-shaping towards what you want it to be you’re more motivated to continue shaping it.
Never forget: You’re the story you tell yourself and sometimes you need to leave yourself behind to enhance.
von Stephan Wüest